I don't put up with shit from men. Which is my personal primary source of relationship material - the male population (though I often wonder why).
Actual quote from a 'fiancee' (there's no ring, no promise, they're 'engaged to be engaged' since *forever*) to coworker: "I won't get you pregnant until you make $30 an hour."
My response: "I'd stab him in the face." (No, I'm not violent, no, why do you say that?)
(No, seriously, the entire first conversation I had with my best friends' now husband when I found out they were engaged ran like Liam Neeson's speech in Taken. "I will find you. I will end you.")
Here's where I sound like an old, old, old woman.
In the first place, why in the hell are they trying to get pregnant? Her job is only part-time, he 'works' as a pool player. Not professionally, not yet. He just makes money by...being a pool shark.
They're not married. I know, I know, old woman. BUT. I am perfectly, perfectly aware that marriage does not make people better or even decent parents. However I do think that people who want to be parents need to demonstrate some kind of commitment to one another and some maturity. These people do not. And it lies, greatly in my mind, in the way they treat the marriage thing. She runs around claiming that they're engaged and he doesn't. They're talking at two completely different levels and *that* is why in their case I harp on the marriage aspect.
She wants a baby, he does not. And he's clearly (trust me) using this desire to manipulate her. Babies are not solutions or BLEEEEEEEEEP-ing accessories. Having a child does not make your life 'perfect' or fix your relationship.
She cries all the time. ALL. THE. TIME. He is the cause of a great deal of it.
I've been party to an emotionally abusive relationship before. By which I mean I watched my mother and step-father go through this entire cycle. And I look at her and her 'fiancee' and that's all I see.
I want to print out one of those abusive relationship check sheets and leave it anonymously on her desk. :(