Wednesday, July 1, 2009

The State of the Amber Address

We're gonna do this nice and simple. :)

1. I'm thinking about going back to school. I've never, actually, graduated college, because I kept screwing around, changing what I wanted to do. My work will actually pay for classes, because the owner feels that better educated employees are better employees. I hadn't taken advantage of this before, because it used to be that they would only pay for classes that led to a business degree, and I knew I definitely didn't want to be a business person. And my mother wants to apply for a grant that would cover the books...

2. Related to 1, my mother wants me to be a High School English teacher. She also wants me to quit my job so I can go to school full time, but that's not happening. I have *always* had a job. I've worked since I was 14. Also, I suspect that this specificity has something to do with the fact that my Opa was a HS English teacher.

3. Religious Ed - I'm feeling...let's go with 'uncomfortable' with this idea, more and more. As someone who *just* finished RCIA, I'm not feeling terribly qualified - surely there are others who are better grounded in the faith? The perhaps inappropriateness of me, as a woman, teaching the faith has come up, and while I'm not entirely sold on it, it is a consideration. I do *not* like the Religious Ed. Director. Let's be honest, if I had kids, and she was the teacher? I would have a *problem* with that, and would pull my kids out. And I'm feeling that, while I *want* to teach, on the one hand, so I can try and make certain the children are being taught correct information, on the other, I'm beginning to think that I shouldn't lend my unspoken support by participation to an activity that I have issues with. Also, there are a few things that, in our initial 'meeting' with her, were left out. Like the classes throughout the year that teachers are required to attend, and the cost thereof. It's not prohibitive, I'm just unhappy that she never even mentioned it. Of course the 'meeting' was not really one, except in theory. And the classes that I'd have to attend? If I go back to school, they would become impossible. And I have to decide, which is more important? And I'm leaning towards my schooling. All of these things keep adding up, and it makes me unhappy, because I wanted to teach, but I'm beginning to think that, at least in this setting, at this time, it's not going to happen.

4. I haven't been sleeping well - I have *very* vivid, half-awake nightmares. I actually came totally awake trying to beat off the little person that was attacking me. The 'little shadow person' was actually the recumbent bike at the end of my bed, and I was whipping it with my sheet. Piglet was staring at me from the pillows at the top of the bed, 'wtf?' clearly expressed in little doggy eyes...

5. I stayed up *way* too late last night reading Dresden Files. Jim Butcher is a dangerous, dangerous man, and should never be allowed to stop writting.

6. I am thinking about wearing my jilbab out on Sunday.

7. My foot continues to hurt. I'm considering taking a couple days off from exercising to see if that helps.

8. 2009 Book List checkup - 42 books. 8 books behind schedule.


  1. You should wear it out! I think you look totally cute, and I would like to hear how it goes for you. Have you worn niqab outside yet?

  2. I think you should totally wear it out as well. And 42 books, wow that is so amazing Amber!!

    I also wish you could go to school full-time, if only because it can be hard to study and work. But, I have no doubt you could do both. I just wish you could also enjoy being a irresponsible college student for awhile :)

    I think you would make an excellent teacher. Hearing your voice in the past, I was amazed by how well-spoken you are, I think you would be excellent with kids.

    I wish I could help you more on the religious education stuff. You have so much confidence, the confidence to wear hijab and jilbab out, so I know you can do it. Love you lots!

  3. I enjoyed the State of Amber Address! I hope you can go back to school if that's what you want to do. And I'm sorry about your foot hurting. Do you know what you have?

    I think you have those vivid nightmares because of some of those "dangerous" books you read. ;-) The description of that nightmare was rather hilarious. :)

  4. Heather,

    I did!

    No niqab yet. I just worked up the nerve to wear hijab/jilbab out! :)

  5. Lisa,

    I actually did it!

    Um, 42 books is slow for me. :( But I mainlined Dresden Files this weekend, so I may be catching up.

    I've always work/study-ied. I can't not have a job: insurance, etc. Much as I would love (some days) to march in to work and shout: I quit! and then run away laughing...

    The more I think on it, the more teaching appeals to me. Maybe not HS though...teenagers are rude and obnoxious little twerps...

    *sigh* I waffle yet again on the rel. ed. class. I *want* to teach it! But should I? *sighs some more*

  6. Susanne,

    I need to go back to school, and I've always wanted to, it's just that I can't see wasting the money (mine or anyone elses) if I don't have a clear goal in mind., I don't know what's wrong with the foot. I should probably go see my doctor, but he'll just refer me to someone else, and, quite frankly, I don't want the extra bill. It's the same foot from the 'Stick Offensive', so I'm guessing that it did more damage inside than I thought. I put a lot of strain on it a few weeks ago, playing laundress (I was litterally on my feet for eight hours) and I think it was just too much, too soon. So I'm trying to rest it as much as I can.

    Heh. You may have a point. Plus all the horror movies I watch...

    It is funny. I even thought it was funny, after I finished waking up. :)


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