2011 Books

Right, it's only about 5:30 here but I'm not going to get another book read before midnight.

So here's the count and list for 2011:

Final count: 186

The goal for next year is 300, as you can see by the little ticker I've got at the top of the blog. I don't think I'll make it, but that's the goal. And since my TBR 'pile' is 589 books strong I've got plenty to choose from.

List:

1. A Lick of Frost – Laurell K. Hamilton (1/1/11)
2. Swallowing Darkness – Laurell K. Hamilton (1/1/11)
3. Divine Misdemeanors – Laurell K. Hamilton (1/1/11)
4. Nightseer – Laurell K. Hamilton (1/2/11)
5. Strange Candy – Laurell K. Hamilton (1/2/11)
6. The Battle for God – Karen Armstrong (1/3/11)
7. Dead Beat – Jim Butcher (1/6/11)
8. Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs – Molly Harper (1/7/11)
9. Grave Sight – Charlaine Harris (1/8/11)
10. Grave Surprise – Charlaine Harris (1/9/11)
11. Fool Moon audiobook – Jim Butcher (1/11/11)
12. An Ice Cold Grave – Charlaine Harris (1/13/11)
13. Proven Guilty – Jim Butcher (1/14/11)
14. Dead Until Dark – Charlaine Harris (1/15/11)
15. Living Dead in Dallas – Charlaine Harris (1/21/11)
16. White Night – Jim Butcher (1/22/11)
17. Club Dead – Charlaine Harris (1/22/11)
18. Dead as a Doornail – Charlaine Harris (1/30/11)
19. Small Favor – Jim Butcher (2/1/11)
20. Grave Peril audiobook – Jim Butcher (2/4/11)
21. True Grit – Charles Portis (2/5/11)
22. Bleach Vol. 33 (2/5/11)
23. Definitely Dead – Charlaine Harris (2/6/11)
24. All Together Dead – Charlaine Harris (2/11/11)
25. From Dead to Worse – Charlaine Harris (2/12/11)
26. Turn Coat – Jim Butcher (2/13/11)
27. Dark and Stormy Knights: Even Hand – Jim Butcher (2/13/11)
28. Dead and Gone – Charlaine Harris (2/16/2011)
29. Dead in the Family – Charlaine Harris (2/18/11)
30. Must Love Hellhounds: The Britlingens Go To Hell – Charlaine Harris (2/19/11)
31. A Touch of Dead – Charlaine Harris (2/20/11)
32. Changes – Jim Butcher (2/22/11)
33. Summer Knight audiobook – Jim Butcher (2/23/11)
34. Side Jobs – Jim Butcher (2/23/11)
35. Hannibal Rising – Thomas Harris (2/25/11)
36. Red Dragon – Thomas Harris (2/28/11)
37. Silence of the Lambs – Thomas Harris (3/4/11)
38. Hannibal – Thomas Harris (3/6/11)
39. Holidays Are Hell: Two Ghosts for Sister Rachel – Kim Harrison (3/6/11)
40. Dates From Hell: Undead in the Garden of Good and Evil – Kim Harrison (3/7/11)
41. Storm Front – Jim Butcher (3/8/11)
42. The Lost Gospel of Mary – Frederica Mathewes-Green (3/13/11)
43. Dead Witch Walking – Kim Harrison (3/13/11)
44. The Good, the Bad, and the Undead – Kim Harrison (3/17/11)
45. Death Masks audiobook – Jim Butcher (3/18/11)
46. Every Which Way But Dead – Kim Harrison (3/20/11)
47. A Fistful of Charms – Kim Harrison (3/23/11)
48. Finder Vol. 1: Target in the Viewfinder (3/24/11)
49. Finder Vol. 2: Cage in the Viewfinder (3/25/11)
50. For a Few Demons More – Kim Harrison (3/27/11)
51. The Outlaw Demon Wails – Kim Harrison (3/27/11)
52. White Witch, Black Curse – Kim Harrison (3/31/11)
53. Unbound: Ley Line Drifer – Kim Harrison (4/1/11)
54. Black Magic Sanction – Kim Harrison (4/2/11)
55. Pale Demon – Kim Harrison (4/3/11)
56. Blood Rites audiobook – Jim Butcher (4/7/11)
57. Treasure Trail – ed. Jack Hart (4/7/11)
58. Midnight Thirsts – ed. Greg Herren (4/8/11)
59. Bad Heir Day – Wendy Holden (4/10/11)
60. Fool Moon – Jim Butcher (4/12/11)
61. Fairyville – Emma Holly (4/12/11)
62. Inu-Yasha Vol. 54 (4/12/11)
63. Inu-Yasha Vol. 55 (4/13/11)
64. Inu-Yasha Vol. 56 (4/13/11)
65. Naruto Vol. 43 (4/14/11)
66. Naruto Vol. 44 (4/14/11)
67. A Thousand Splendid Sons – Khaled Hosseini (4/16/11)
68. Islam: A Short History – Karen Armstrong (4/16/11)
69. Naruto Vol. 45 (4/16/11)
70. Bleach Vol. 34 (4/17/11)
71. Naruto Vol. 46 (4/17/11)
72. Naruto Vol. 47 (4/17/11)
73. Naruto Vol. 48 (4/17/11)
74. Naurto Vol. 49 (4/18/11)
75. Blood Price – Tanya Huff (4/19/11)
76. Naruto Vol. 50 (4/20/11)
77. The Footprints of God – Greg Iles (4/20/11)
78. The Haunting – Shirley Jackson (4/23/11)
79. Posted to Death – Dean James (4/23/11)
80. The Jewel of Medina – Sherry Jones (4/24/11)
81. Carpe Demon – Julie Kenner (4/24/11)
82. Finger Vol. 3: One Wing in the Viewfinder (4/25/11)
83. The Beekeeper's Apprentice – Julie R. King (4/29/11)
84. Dead Beat audiobook – Jim Butcher (5/3/11)
85. Dead Reckoning – Charlaine Harris (5/6/11)
86. A Monstrous Regiment of Women – Laurie R. King (5/7/11)
87. Grave Peril – Jim Butcher (5/12/11)
88. A Letter of Mary – Laurie R. King (5/14/11)
89. The Moor – Laurie R. King (5/18/11)
90. O Jerusalem – Laurie R. King (5/21/11)
91. Summer Knight – Jim Butcher (5/23/11)
92. Justice Hall – Laurie R. King (5/25/11)
93. The Language of the Bees – Laurie R. King (5/28/11)
94. Voices Behind the Veil – Ergun Mehmet Caner (5/31/11)
95. Death Masks – Jim Butcher (6/5/11)
96. Bag of Bones – Stephen King (6/6/11)
97. Proven Guilty audiobook – Jim Butcher (6/7/11)
98. Carrie – Stephen King (6/7/11)
99. The World Religions – Huston Smith (6/8/11)
100. Interview with an Exorcist – Jose A. Fortea (6/9/11)
101. Christine – Stephen King (6/13/11)
102. Blood Rites – Jim Butcher (6/16/11)
103. Cujo – Stephen King (6/17/11)
104. Smokin' Seventeen – Janet Evanovich (6/22/11)
105. Dead Beat – Jim Butcher (6/29/11)
106. The Eyes of the Dragon – Stephen King (6/29/11)
107. Naamah's Blessing – Jacqueline Carey (7/3/11)
108. The Dark Tower I: The Gunslinger – Stephen King (7/3/11)
109. The Dark Tower II: The Drawing of the Three – Stephen King (7/8/11)
110. Proven Guilty – Jim Butcher (7/11/11)
111. The Dark Tower III: The Waste Lands – Stephen King (7/13/11)
112. White Night – Jim Butcher (7/19/11)
113. Naked City: Curses – Jim Butcher (7/25/11)
114. White Night audiobook – Jim Butcher (7/25/11)
115. Augustus: The Life of Rome's First Emperor – Anthony Everitt (7/25/11)
116. Ghost Story – Jim Butcher (7/26/11)
117. Bleach Vol. 35 (7/26/11)
118. Naruto Vol. 51 (7/26/11)
119. Ouran High School Host Club (7/26/11)
120. Spell Bound – Kelley Armstrong (7/29/11)
121. Small Favor – Jim Butcher (8/4/11)
122. 1 Enoch – George W.E. Nickelsburg (8/6/11)
123. The Naked City: Curses – Jim Butcher (8/9/11)
124. The Dark Tower IV: Wizard and Glass – Stephen King (8/14/11)
125. Turn Coat – Jim Butcher (8/17/11)
126. Dark and Stormy Knights: Even Hand – Jim Butcher (8/18/11)
127. Small Favor audiobook – Jim Butcher (8/24/11)
128. Changes – Jim Butcher (8/27/11)
129. Side Jobs – Jim Butcher (8/28/11)
130. Geek Wisdom: The Sacred Teachings of Nerd Culture – ed. Stephen H. Segal (8/28/11)
131. The Tyrant Falls in Love Vol. 1 (8/29/11)
132. Ghost Story – Jim Butcher (9/5/11)
133. The Help – Kathryn Stockett (9/10/11)
134. Finder Vol. 4: Prisoner in the Viewfinder (9/11/11)
135. The Lincoln Lawyer – Michael Connelly (9/14/11)
136. The Dark Tower V: Wolves of the Calla (9/15/11)
137. The Eagle – Rosemary Sutcliff (9/16/11)
138. The Mythology of Supernatural – Nathan Robert Brown (9/20/11)
139. Turn Coat audiobook – Jim Butcher (9/21/11)
140. Supernatural: Coyote's Kiss – Christa Faust (9/22/11)
141. The Dark Tower VI: Song of Susannah – Stephen King (9/24/11)
142. Author's Pet (9/24/11)
143. Bleach Vol. 36 (9/24/11)
144. Naruto Vol. 52 (9/24/11)
145. Supernatural: Night Terror – John Passarella (9/28/11)
146. The Dark Tower VII: The Dark Tower – Stephen King (9/28/11)
147. The Dead Zone – Stephen King (9/30/11)
148. The Brass Verdict – Michael Connelly (10/5/11)
149. Desperation – Stephen King (10/7/11)
150. The Reversal – Michael Connelly (10/13/11)
151. Different Seasons – Stephen King (10/15/11)
152. Dolores Claiborne – Stephen King (10/15/11)
153. Changes audiobook – Jim Butcher (10/19/11)
154. The Fifth Witness – Michael Connelly (10/24/11)
155. Dreamcatcher – Stephen King (10/24/11)
156. Destination Truth: Memoirs of a Monster Hunter (10/26/11)
157. The Silver Pigs – Lindsey Davis (11/02/11)
158. Duma Key – Stephen King (11/04/11)
159. Everything's Eventual – Stephen King (11/14/11)
160. Shadows in Bronze – Lindsey Davis (11/15/11)
161. Side Jobs audiobook – Jim Butcher (11/17/11)
162. Firestarter – Stephen King (11/19/11)
163. Venus in Copper – Lindsey Davis (11/23/11)
164. Explosive Eighteen – Janet Evanovich (11/26/11)
165. Perfectly Plum – Leah Wilson (11/28/11)
166. The Scottish Prisoner – Diana Gabaldon (12/1/11)
167. The Dresden Files: Fool Moon Vol. 1 – Jim Butcher (12/1/11)
168. Four Past Midnight – Stephen King (12/2/11)
169. From A Buick 8 – Stephen King (12/7/11)
170. Private Teacher Vol. 1 (12/7/11)
171. Gerald's Game – Stephen King (12/9/11)
172. The Iron Hand of Mars – Lindsey Davis (12/12/11)
173. The Green Mile – Stephen King (12/17/11)
174. Only Serious About You Vol. 1 (12/17/11)
175. The Tyrant Falls In Love Vol. 2 (12/17/11)
176. Ghost Story (audiobook) – Jim Butcher (12/20/11)
177. Two for the Lions – Lindsey Davis (12/20/11)
178. The Shack – Wm. Paul Young (12/26/11)
179. Bleach Vol. 37 (12/28/11)
180. Naruto Vol. 53 (12/29/11)
181. The Tyrant Falls in Love Vol. 3 (12/29/11)
182. The Tyrant Falls in Love Vol. 4 (12/30/11)
183. Hearts in Atlantis – Stephen King (12/30/11)
184. Mere Christianity – C.S. Lewis (12/31/11)
185. In the Garden of Beasts – Erik Larson (12/31/11)
186. Hidden – Kelley Armstrong (12/31/11)

2011 Meme

We're about at the end of the year so I'm finally doing this...

1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?

*thinks* Nothing comes to mind. I think it was a very routine kind of year. Or, well, I'm planning a baby shower and I've never done that before. So we'll throw that out there.

2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

Didn't make any. 

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Not yet. Evesdottir will make her appearance in 2012.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Nope.

5. What countries did you visit?

Imagination-land.

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?

Hmmm...I don't know. I want many things but they're all more long term. Right now I'm relatively content. Let's go with the old safety - a boyfriend.

7. What date from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Probably the night we heard bin Laden had been killed. Though I won't recall the date, specifically since I already can't remember what day it was. But I'll remember hearing about it and everyone being on FB all night.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Finally signing up to go back to school

9. What was your biggest failure?

I don't fail! ;D Um. I really don't know...

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Not really.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I bought a bunch of presents for the Salvation Army Angel tree. I picked a little 2 yo girl and got her almost everything on her list, with some very wonderful and welcome help from my mom.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

My boss.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

A co-worker. NOT SBW, by the way Susanne. Someone else entirely.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Books or training.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

So many things. SO. Many. I'm easily excitable! I got REALLY excited for Thor, Captain America, my best friend's pregnancy, The Avengers trailer, Ghost Story coming out, The Dark Knight Rises trailer, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo....are we sensing a theme?

16. What song(s) will always remind you of 2011?

The cover of Immigrant Song on The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo soundtrack.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. Happier or sadder?

ii. the same

iii. Thinner or fatter?

iv. thinner

v. richer or poorer?

vi.*laughs* probably about the same as last year

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Reading. I fell down from last year, I think.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Hmmm...playing Mah-jong. I got addicted for a while and that ate significant amounts of free time.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?

I spent it playing with the puppy we're dog sitting and baking. Also, watching Alien and Aliens. 

21. How many one-night stands?

365

22. What was your favorite TV program?

American Horror Story

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Nope. Same old list.

24. What was the best book you read?

Oh, that's tough. All the books? I'll actually have to look over my list at home tonight and get back to you on that.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

I've actually been listening to books on cd in the car and not listening to the radio. So really, nothing.

26. What did you want and get?

So very many things.

27. What was your favorite film of this year?

Surprisingly, I think it's going to have to be The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. Yes, it's edged out even my comic book movies.

28. What did you do on your birthday?

Um. I...read. Perfect birthday!

29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?

Casual and comfy.

30. What kept you sane?

Who says I am?

31. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Michael Fassbender and Jeremy Renner.

32. What political issue stirred you the most?

SOPA

33. Who did you miss?

Nobody.

34. Who was the best new person you met?

I don't think I met anyone new!

35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.

Enhance the calm.

Baby Shower Ideas

Okay, this is partially a place for me to keep track of 'game' ideas, etc. but also a place where you all can make suggestions.

Note: They're registered at Toys R Us & Target.

Note 2: No pork or shellfish - his family is 7th Day Adventist. Also, vegetarian option since Eve is a vegetarian.

Note 3: Possibility for shower: A tea with little tea/finger sandwiches and different hot teas for people to try.

Please, make suggestions! I need ideas! Very few of my friends have had children at this point so I haven't been to a lot of baby showers and am more than welcoming ideas!

1. Diapers = every guest gets a diaper and a magic marker. They write something cute/funny/uplifting on the diaper so when Eve and Kyle are changing diapers they get a laugh.

2. Scrapbook pages guests can write advice on, decorate with stickers, markers, etc.

3. Clothespins = everyone gets a clothespin when they arrive. If they say the word 'baby' they lose the clothespin. Whoever has the most clothespins at the end of the party gets a prize.

4. Have everyone personalize a baby T-shirt or one-piece outfit. Before the party, buy a bunch of white or light-colored garments and round up a few small, flat pieces of cardboard to slip inside the clothes to make them easier to decorate. Also pick up fabric paint, paint pens, and/or stamps and permanent fabric ink. Have the guests decorate the clothes any way they want — and make sure they sign them. People can take turns stopping by the craft table throughout the shower. When they're done, hang them up to dry on a clothesline or use baby hangers. Buy several different sizes. That way, the gifts last longer as the baby grows out of some and into others. Can also do this with bibs so there is less to decorate.

5. Everyone brings baby picture of themselves and people have to guess who it is.

6. Make a time capsule for the baby. In the invitations, ask everyone to bring in something that would fit into a gallon jar. The best items are things for the baby to have or read when he or she is older. People have brought in newspaper articles, messages to the baby written on paper or recorded on a CD or DVD, photographs, mementos, even jewelry. Anything will work as long as it fits into the jar.

7. Ahead of time, print each letter of the alphabet on an individual sheet of paper. Once your guests are seated, pass out one sheet of lettered paper to each person along with a supply of markers, crayons, colored pencils, and stickers.

Ask each guest to decorate her page with things that relate to her letter – for example, whoever has letter "A" might draw pictures of apples, alligators, and ants. Your guests should also put their name on the page somewhere and can include a note to the soon-to-arrive baby if they like. After the shower, laminate the pages and bind them together, then give the collection to the guest of honor. (This one would be a little problematic since she's only thinking that there will be about 12 guests.)

It's not like she didn't know the baby was coming...

And let's pause to have a moment of freaking annoyance.


Eve, who is carrying Evesdottir, has told me the entire time, very vehemently that she does not want a baby shower. She hates all the things that go with baby showers, doesn't like groups of people, etc. etc. So I told her fine, we wouldn't have a baby shower. Then I get a message last night on FB from her telling me to call her grandmother because Ada wants to volunteer her house for the baby shower.


WHAT BABY SHOWER?


Oh, the baby shower she didn't want, but now wants and I suddenly have to plan. THAT baby shower. Which, okay, it's going to be small - mostly family from what she's saying and nothing fancy. She doesn't want any games, nothing. Fine. I still need to get a list of names and addresses of people to invite, get where she's registered (because she registered and didn't tell anyone where) and get the invitations out in time for people to buy presents and actually show up. The woman is six months pregnant. By the time I get all of this done she could be bringing Evesdottir with her to the party! Outside of her stomach!


Okay. Moving on.

Movie: The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

I know, fannish things belong on the fan blog but basically...it's my blog and I'll post what I want! :p

I'm thinking of moving movie and book reviews over here anyway, assuming that they're more than just me going: SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE and babbling about the shiny. ;)

First things first: I haven't read the books. I haven't seen the Swedish films. I am coming to this only through the American version of the movie.

That being said, I will be reading the books and seeing the Swedish films as soon as the opportunity arises.

So then.

I loved this movie. Though saying that does not, perhaps, convey the depth of ALL THE FEELINGS that I have for it.

Okay, a basic overview of the movie:


Mikael Blomkvist (played by the ever delicious Daniel Craig) is the editor of Millenium magazine. He's just lost a libel suit brought against him by Wennerstrom, a wealthy businessman. In the process Blomkvist has basically been wiped out. He's lost all his money, everything. He resigns from the magazine in an attempt to distance himself from it, hoping to spare his partner Erika (played by Robin Wright, whom I also adore) and the magazine from being destroyed along with him though everyone knows that Wennerstrom won't stop until he's burned them to the ground and then salted the earth.


In the middle of all this he gets called up to a remote island by Mr. Frode, the attorney for Henrik Vanger, another very wealthy man.


Vanger wants Blomkvist to solve the 40 year old murder of his great-niece, Harriet. She disappeared one day and he is convinced that a member of the family murdered her. Blomkvist is going to turn down the job but Vanger promises him not only a lot of money, but some information that will allow him to take Wennerstrom down for good.


Under the guise of writing Henrik's memoir, Blomkvist moves into a small guest house on the island and starts to investigate. He gets nowhere fast until his daughter drops by for a visit on her way to a Bible camp and notices that the meaningless numbers in the back of Harriet's notebook are references to Bible verses from Leviticus.



Blomkvist realizes that he needs a research assistant to help him track down and figure out what these verses have to do with the women's names beside them so he goes back to Mr. Frode to ask if he knows of anyone. Frode recommends the firm that they had do the background check on Blomkvist before they hired him. Which leads Blomkvist to Lisbeth Salander - the titular girl with the dragon tattoo.


Lisbeth is different, to say the least.


Visual aides are best, so here's a pic of what she looks like in the movie:

And it's not just her fashion choices, of course. She's antisocial, rarely faces anyone directly or looks them in the eyes. And she's a genius. There's clearly been a lot of abuse at some point in her life, and she's been marginalized because of the effects that the trauma has had on her. She was declared legally incompetent as a very young girl and the state has control of her finances. Lisbeth's guardian clearly understands the truth of her situation and lets her control her own finances but early on in the movie he has a stroke and is left unable to fulfill his legal role to her.


A new guardian is assigned, and he takes a hard line with Lisbeth, giving her a monthly salary and nothing else.


Soon after that her laptop is broken and she has to ask for the money to repair it. He gives it to her after forcing her to perform fellatio on him.


A little later on she calls him, claiming to need money for rent and meets him at his apartment. He beats her, knocks her out, ties her to his bed and rapes her. What he doesn't know is that Lisbeth records the whole thing. She calls him sometime later (a few days? the timeline there isn't quite clear in the movie) and tells him she needs money for food.


Once he lets her into the apartment she tasers his ass. When he wakes up she's got him tied to the floor of his bedroom and plays the recording for him. She shoves what looks an awful lot like a cattle prod to me up his ass and proceeds to kick the living shit out of him. Then she explains how he is going to give her control of her money, he is going to write glowing reports about her and how she is adapting to 'normal' society and he is going to start getting her declared competent so that she will have true control over her life. And he is never, ever to have another woman in private with him again. Ever. Or she'll kill him.


To make sure he won't forget the rules, especially the celibacy one, she tattoos 'I AM A RAPIST PIG' in giant letters on his chest and stomach.


I have to admit, I love Lisbeth a lot. A lot a lot. Anyway...


Blomkvist convinces the security firm she works for to give him her address, which does not go over well when he just sort of shows up and politely barges his way into her apartment. He comes within a few seconds of being tased himself. Then he draws her in: he wants her to help him catch a killer of women.


They go back to the island and...well. Investigation happens, secrets are uncovered and that's all I'm saying. I won't give away the ending or the plot twists, though if you've read the book you know what happens.


The mystery aspect of the story was decent. I had my suspicions as to who the killer was, but I wasn't positive and most of the time that's all I can ask of a mystery.

There is some (obviously) graphic violence and much of it is of a sexual nature. But I don't feel as though it was done for the sake of glorifying the violence or done in an over the top splatter-fest manner.

The creepiest part for me was the killer playing Enya (Orinoco Flow) in the background as he gets ready to murder someone, but that could just be me.

The title sequence reminded me a little too much of the Bond title sequences, but that's neither here nor there.


In conclusion: the movie is well worth the time and the money to go see it.

Also, ps: I totally ship Lisbeth and Blomkvist.

The Great Sin

I am really trying to at least finish reading this book before New Years, if not finish posting about it. I'm a chapter or so ahead of what I'm posting at the moment.

Mostly this is due to the fact that one of my Christmas presents was American Jesus by Stephen Prothero and I'm going to break protocol and read that one next rather than throw it into the Bag of Books! So I'm really looking forward to getting to start it but I need to finish Mere Christianity first!

Another of my presents, by the by, was In the Garden of Beasts by Erik Larson, thanks to my fabulous Big Sis! That book is on Murdock so I'm reading it at the gym. I just started it, but it's already very engrossing. *blinks* I've just realised this means I'm not currently reading any fiction books. *waits to see if the world will come to an end* So far so good!

So let's see...we're up to Pride.

"There is one vice of which no man in the world is free; which every one in the world loathes when he sees it in someone else; and of which hardly any people, except Christians, ever imagine that they are guilty themselves. I have heard people admit that they are bad-tempered, or that they cannot keep their heads about girls or drink, or even that they are cowards. I do not think I have ever heard anyone who was not a Christian accuse himself of this vice. And at the same time I have very seldom met anyone, who was not a Christian, who showed the slightest mercy to it in others. There is no fault which makes a man more unpopular, and no fault which we are more unconscious of in our-selves. And the more we have it ourselves, the more we dislike it in others.

"The vice I am talking of is Pride or Self-Conceit: and the virtue opposite to it, in Christian morals, is called Humility. You may remember, when I was talking about sexual morality, I warned you that the centre of Christian morals did not lie there. Well, now, we have come to the centre. According to Christian teachers, the essential vice, the utmost evil, is Pride."

And that's because...pride was the first sin, right? According to most Christian thinking at any rate. Pride was what caused Lucifer to refuse to bow down and serve humanity, who he saw as being lesser than himself and all the other angels, and/or to believe that he could sit on God's throne. 

"if you want to find out how proud you are the easiest way is to ask yourself, `How much do I dislike it when other people snub me, or refuse to take any notice of me, or shove their oar in, or patronise me, or show off?' The point is that each person's pride is in competition with every one else's pride."

I think that's true, to a point. But then you also can't allow yourself to be a doormat either. There are people out there who don't respect opinions, etc. and will just move you around like a doll if you let them. Users. Do they maybe have an overdose of pride? I think so. But you not having any pride/spine isn't a solution either. Sometimes the scenarios Lewis lists are clashes of egos(pride). Other times they're other people being assholes and/or manipulative.

"Pride gets no pleasure out of having something, only out of having more of it than the next man."

"Pride is competitive by its very nature: that is why it goes on and on. If I am a proud man, then, as long as there is one man in the whole world more powerful, or richer, or cleverer than I, he is my rival and my enemy."

"Other vices may sometimes bring people together: you may find good fellowship and jokes and friendliness among drunken people or unchaste people. But pride always means enmity—it is enmity. And not only enmity between man and man, but enmity to God. In God you come up against something which is in every respect immeasurably superior to yourself. Unless you know God as that—and, therefore, know yourself as nothing in comparison—you do not know God at all. As long as you are proud you cannot know God. A proud man is always looking down on things and people: and, of course, as long as you are looking down, you cannot see something that is above you."

I think it's obvious but I should point out that there is a difference between Pride and pride. And Lewis does make that point later on. There's the Pride that he talks about above, where it drives you to be in competition with, basically, everything and everyone under the sun because you need to be better than they are in every respect in order to feel good about yourself and then there's pride in things. We'll talk about that in a bit.

Lewis believes that people who are clearly Prideful cannot ever be truly religious. They 'worship an imaginary God' according to him and are in reality being misled by the devil. Or their own egos, since we know how much I hate blaming everything that goes wrong in a persons life (or the world) on the poor devil.

"They theoretically admit themselves to be nothing in the presence of this phantom God, but are really all the time imagining how He approves of them and thinks them far better than ordinary people: that is, they pay a pennyworth of imaginary humility to Him and get out of it a pound's worth of Pride towards their fellow-men. I suppose it was of those people Christ was thinking when He said that some would preach about Him and cast out devils in His name, only to be told at the end of the world that He had never known them. And any of us may at any moment be in this death-trap. Luckily, we have a test. Whenever we find that our religious life is making us feel that we are good—above all, that we are better than someone else—I think we may be sure that we are being acted on, not by God, but by the devil. The real test of being in the presence of God is, that you either forget about yourself altogether or see yourself as a small, dirty object. It is better to forget about yourself altogether."

I totally get this. I didn't think it at the time, but when I was covering I did fall into this category. I said that I wasn't judging the women who didn't cover, but I did. Not always consciously, but I did. I thought that I was better, closer to God than they were for doing so and that they just needed to be educated and then they'd see how wrong they were. I felt very good about being so humble.

The funny thing is this: Lewis points out that quite often people use Pride in order to overcome lesser sins. Cowardice, lust, anger, etc. have all been overcome by an appeal to Pride, that they are beneath someone's dignity.

"The devil laughs. He is perfectly content to see you becoming chaste and brave and self-controlled provided, all the time, he is setting up in you the Dictatorship of Pride—just as he would be quite content to see your chilblains cured if he was allowed, in return, to give you cancer. For Pride is spiritual cancer: it eats up the very possibility of love, or contentment, or even common sense."

Okay. On to the lower case 'pride' which is not the same as the sin of Pride.

Lewis says:

1. Pleasure in being praised is not Pride. Feeling good that you've been told you did a good job is a good and natural thing. Because the pleasure comes not from feeling that you are superior inherently in and of yourself, but in pleasing someone that you wanted to please. The trouble, where this goes from pride to Pride, is when you go from thinking 'I've pleased them' to thinking 'How great am I that I've done all of this?' And the more you delight in yourself and the less in the praise, the worse you are. At the point when you feel completely self-satisfied all the time and don't care at all what anyone else thinks, ever, because you know that you're the best thing out there then you've hit rock bottom.

2. Pride in family, school, regiment, workplace. Lewis says that it all depends on what the person means when they say they're proud of such things. If they mean that they have warm admiration for them, then that's right and fine. You should feel good about the institutions that you join and participate in. But if they mean that they're somehow better than anyone else because they 'come from' such and such a family, or they went to such and such a school then that has gone over into the area of Pride.

3. God doesn't forbid Pride because He's offended by it. God wants to make people humble in order to make the moment possible where you can meet him. Lewis believes that you cannot get near God and not be humbled by it. (Which I totally agree with. If you were to really meet something so much more powerful than yourself, the only sane reaction is a realization of the very smallness of your own being.) So God forbids Pride because it is such the opposite of human nature in relation to Himself. Pride will not, according to Lewis, ever get you anything or where good in the long run, especially not in the spiritual sense. And since that's the ultimate end of everything, to die and go before God, that's the biggest thing to focus on.

4. A truly humble person is not one that is always telling you that they're nobody. It is someone who you would never even think of in that way. Someone who is cheerful and smart who people just generally like.

AHS - All the love

You can have some coherence tomorrow. For now:

1) Tate. Tate. JFC. There is nothing that you can do that will make me not like you. Trying to 'make' Violet a boyfriend? I am aware of how messed up that is, and yet still find it adorable and want to cuddle you for the thought. Don't worry, she'll forgive you eventually.

2) The family ganging up to run off/save the new family.

3) Vivien and her baby.

4) Constance, whose name is never Candace. She's the real monster of the show, I don't care what anyone has said.

5) MICHAEL. I was half thinking that the 'devil' baby was not going to live up to the hype. That he'd be a normal kid. Happily, it appears that I was wrong.