We have one woman here in the department who is very proud of her faith. I've spoken of her before, Southern Baptist Woman!*
*Disclaimer: Her actions and/or beliefs are not to be taken as universal to all Southern Baptists.
SBW! likes to say that she never lies because lying is a sin. Okay. I'm behind that. I try not to lie for the same reason. I don't claim that I *never* lie, because I do. So saying I didn't would be another lie! I do my best not to lie, of course, but I used to be a nearly compulsive liar. It's a hard habit to break, especially when the truth is something I personally don't like. But this is not about me! :) Anyway. SBW! makes a big deal of her lack of lying. And I'll say that I've never caught her in a lie, so it may even be true. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt there.
My issue is that SBW! uses this 'honesty policy' as an excuse for absolute rudeness. For example: One of the other women in the department is trying out new contact lenses. She's got to use tri-focals, and I guess these are contacts that do the same thing. We're very used to her wearing glasses, so when she came in the first day without the glasses it was very obvious. SBW!, when we were talking about the glasses vs. contact lenses thing, busts out with, 'When you first walked in, I thought you had two black eyes!'. And we all just *stared* at her. Because yes, the woman did have fairly noticeable bags under her eyes - she's not used to having to put makeup on to cover them because the glasses covered them - but SBW! said it exactly that way, in front of the entire department. Rather than just saying something polite, like, 'Oh, I think you look better with the glasses', or even, taking her aside and pointing out that she had bags under her eyes one on one, privately.
And she does this a lot. It's never anything untrue, but the way she does it is rude. There's a way to be both honest and polite, and SBW! doesn't seem to either get it or care about it. She seems to think that as long as she doesn't lie, she can say whatever she wants to say.
That's not true.
It's true that sometimes what we will say, no matter how we try and say it, will hurt someones feelings or make them angry. And sometimes what must be said should be said without sugar coating. But there are plenty of times, most of the time in fact, where a little tact is called for. A little consideration for the feelings and humanity of the person you're talking to.