Tuesday, December 22, 2009

What's the Best Way to Meet A Spouse?

I'm reading through the back posts of this blog, and I just finished reading the series that she did on how she met her husband. It's cute, and if you like stories like that, you should go read them. Plus, it's a very interesting blog all on its own. :)

Anyway, because she's Muslim, she wound up meeting her husband through a series of marriage interviews. So, I'm naturally curious, and thought I'd ask ya'll.

What do you think is the best way to meet a spouse? And I don't mean, 'go clubbing'. I mean, for a lasting marriage, what do you think is the best way to go about finding a husband(/wife)? And why? Why do you think that's best?

No particularly pressing reason, of course, for the question. I promise not to take your thoughts and run off and try to bag myself a husband that way. ;-) I just found the whole 'marriage interview' thing interesting and wanted to see what other people think.


  1. I always went on the "friends first" theory. You get to know each other before the physical part of the relationship gets in the way. It allows you to take the time and get to know the person. A lot of people forget to get to know their significant others because they are blinded by attraction and love. It can overshadow the truth, including incompatability (Im guilty of this in the past so I can talk about it lol)

  2. I think marriage interviews are a great idea. I think it's great to know what you're looking for and be pragmatic.

    I think, if we can use our networks and use agencies to get jobs, why not for marriage?

    If I ever do it again that's what I'll do, I think.

  3. Maybe getting involved in church ministries or book clubs and developing friendships. I like that "friends first" option as LK mentioned. Also friends of friends - people setting you up on blind dates works. It's so different for everyone. Maybe if you go back to school, you will meet Mr. Right there. Or perhaps at your church or another church. I have friends who met each other at a Bible study years ago and they ended up marrying. The go clubbing method isn't one I recommend though it works for some and it seems it's not your style anyway. :)

  4. LK,

    I can't imagine marrying someone I don't like, or know, so yeah, friends first has always seemed like the best way to go. Preferably a nerd like me, so we can have heated discussions over BSG, SG, Star Trek, etc. :)

    I'm not so big on the 'blinding love' scenario, because that sort of stuff burns out, and then what do you have?

    Been there, done that too.

  5. Wrestling,

    I kind of like the idea of having a questionnaire, but I'm not sure the whole, interview, decide to marry without really knowing them first thing works. At least not for me...

    But having a list of things that you need to know about each other, so you know if you have common goals, etc. seems like a good idea.

    Ah, forgive me, and you don't have to answer (obviously), but, I had the impression you were married now?

  6. Susanne,

    All good ideas. Now, if only I lived in a town with an average age that wasn't 60. :)

    Yeah, 'clubbing' is clearly not my style. ;)

    But I was thinking, in the question, more generally (not for me!): What's the ideal way to find your mate? Arranged marriage? Marrying someone you've only met once or twice? Courtship? Friends first? That sort of stuff.

  7. Oh, in that case I'd say courtship or friends first. I am not a fan of arranged marriages although they work for some, apparently. :)

    Yeah, too bad you live in an old area, but don't limit God. There is someone out there, I'm sure! :-)

  8. BSG!!!!! Sorry a tad bit obsessed with that show at the moment lol My Love LOVES BSG....happy happy happy!

  9. Susanne,

    I love the elderly, but sometimes, I wish they'd bring their 20-30 something single grandsons to church...

  10. LK,

    I can understand why. I love the remake of BSG, and I'm working on getting the entire series on DVD.

    Have you seen the commercials for Caprica? It also looks lovely.

  11. christian internet dating?

    then you know they have your values? it will open up a larger area to you. always take a friend when meeting and if possible their friend as well. you can then see what they are really like as they cant hide as much if the friend is there.

    in your profile mention battle star, star trek all the nerdy stuff.

    I am lucky enough to have found my man, I looked for a long time. Then poof, I went back to college and there I found my geek.

    youll find him Amber, judt dont look in the normal places

  12. Slice,

    Hmm...possibly. But personally I'm too paranoid about meeting an axe murderer that way. :)

    I'm trying to *stop* looking. I'm working under the idea that it might be like watching water boil. It seems like it'll never happen if you keep watching for it...


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