So, I was thinking. Shush. Don't act so shocked.
I have a passing familiarity with this thing you people call a 'speed limit'. It's not that I'm a bad driver, certainly, I was taught to drive by my grandfather, who was a cop and worked with the FBI. I'm a *good* driver. I've been in one accident, and they hit me while I was sitting still. However, I do tend to drive at, what has been called, 'ludicrous speed' as opposed to 'light speed' ($20 of imaginary money if you get the movie reference).
When I moved, I had to start taking a different way to work, and this involved a windy road. I slowed down. I was scared, a little. I could feel the car shifting under me, and was convinced that I was going to flip if I went even a little over the limit. That was...two years ago? I speed on it now. (Note: I'm not encouraging speeding. I know I shouldn't, and I try to not go as fast as I used to, but it's *hard*.) I'm not scared anymore. It was new, I had to adjust. And I did.
Same thing with hijab. I was nervous, I was twitchy, I talked myself out of it a couple times. A little less than a month later, I'm not nervous.
I'm actually sitting at work, in my hijab.
I'm still not full time. I wear it when I feel the need, and cover in other ways other times.
People've been *friendlier*, which is weird. And work people just joke. They all agree it looks lovely. (Of course, my one friend insists that I need to walk ten paces behind him now, but he's kidding, really.)
Now, this Sunday is my first day teaching the class without Deb. I usually let her lead since she has much more experience with kids, but she has to attend a meeting for her kids who are in pre-Confirmation classes. So it's me and a 'temp' who works in the front office. I'm nervous. I'm afraid she's going to think I don't know what I'm doing.
Soo....that's where I'm at.
Sitting at work in hijab, worrying about teaching class. *sigh*
Dont worry it will be great. You have a lot of good ideas.
ReplyDeleteYAY you are at work in hijab. I'm glad no one gives you a hard time.
It does get easier. :) It's so weird that I used to feel so self-conscious when I went out in hijab, and now I feel self-conscious when I'm not covered.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you'll be fine w/the class. It's normal to be nervous, even when you have the experience, and I don't think she'll think you don't know what you're doing. You learn as you go, everyone has trouble starting out. I hope it goes great, though.
You will do great teaching. Just be yourself and follow the plan. Remember you aren't Deb so don't try to be her. The kids like you already - be confident, smile and teach 'em something good! I'm sure you all will have a great time! :)
ReplyDeleteWonderful! Do you use mostly square scarves or shaylas?
ReplyDeleteLK,
ReplyDeleteThanks, it went well, though I think I called the other lady by the wrong name the whole time. :)
At work in hijab again....:)
Sanil,
ReplyDeleteMy *ears* feel naked when I'm not wearing hijab, which is just weird. :)
*breathes* The class went well, I think. The kids had fun, and learned, so that's all the really matters...
Susanne,
ReplyDeleteThanks. Of course, we don't really have a plan, as such. :) But I followed our vague outline of a plan, and it worked out okay. :)
Stacy,
ReplyDeleteThanks!
I prefer shayla scarves, myself. I can wrap them a bit looser and they don't make my face look as fat as the square ones do. :)