Tuesday, January 25, 2011

*eyetwitch*

I'm developing a freaking tic here!

*takes deep, calming breaths*

Once again, Baptist lady in front of me has thrown into conversation the phrase, 'oh, that's right, you don't believe in the Bible'.

*head.desk*

First, I never said that. What I have said, multiple times, is that I do not believe that everything that is in the Bible is literally true. I have even demarcated where I think that shift, in general, occurs in the Old Testament stories. I have explained it. I have explained that the Bible is not, in fact, a book, but a collection of documents that originally had different purposes, different authors. Some historical, some theological, etc. Poetry, for pete's sake! Is there spiritual value in all of these documents? Yes.

Second, what does that phrase even MEAN? Do you mean that I don't believe the Bible exists? If that's the case, well, that's just dumb. Okay? Do you mean that I don't believe the Bible is the means to my salvation? If that's the case then yeah. You're right. I don't. It's a tool. I BELIEVE IN God, Christ, and the Holy Spirit. The Bible is not the core of Christianity! It is not Bible-anity. I- I- *chews on the furniture*

GNAH!

ETA: AND ON A RELATED NOTE!

It is NOT my fault that you pay no attention when told what the deposit procedures are. NOT. I don't MAKE the accounting policies, I just inform and enforce them.

IT IS NOT THAT HARD TO MAKE A DEPOSIT FOR EACH SEPARATE CC BATCH! STOP BEING A WHINER!

RAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRR!

5 comments:

  1. HAHAHAHAHA! This post made me laugh! Sorry for those silly Baptists in your life. God must put them there to build your character!! Fie on the Baptists! At least you love ME, right? :D


    BTW, why did she say this? Did it have to do with her not knowing anything about deposit procedures?

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  2. Ugh. It's just her, really. I swear. I should stop mentioning that she's a Baptist, because that's not the problem. It's *her*.

    You know I love you Big Sis! *mwa*

    The two arguments are actually different ones. We were talking about...something, I don't remember exactly what. It likely had to do with an obit, since that's part of her job. And whatever my answer was, that's what she came back with. It was clearly so important to me that I've forgotten what the conversation was exactly about. :D

    The deposit thing came later. I'd posted this post and then THAT happened. And so. Rawr.

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  3. Ha...you're so cute! :) Well, I find it funny when you refer to her as the Baptist woman. Really. I was laughing as soon as I saw "eyetwitch" and then Baptist! :D

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  4. Heee. I kind of love someone making that comment to you. It just seems so bizarre. And I like your rant about it.

    How does that even come up, though? :D Does she purposely bring up the Bible as often as she can just so she can make a dig? Or does she mean that in a totally innocent and polite way, like she actually just forgot (leaving aside that it's not what you actually said anyway)?

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  5. It *is* bizarre!

    I think it comes up most of the time because she does the obits and if there's something in there related to the service or a term she doesn't know, she asks me. So we talk about different religious rituals every so often. And I think she brings it up because it boggles her that I don't believe the Bible is 100% literal.

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