Sunday, January 2, 2011

Ramblings on Marriage - Does it last after death?

This has been bugging me and I by no means expect an answer from you guys here. I'm just going to ramble it out.

A little while back over on...yeah. Heather's blog there was a discussion and we somehow wound up talking briefly about the Orthodox view on marriage. The woman who brought it up had a problem with the Orthodox position which was that marriage was forever - even after death. Meaning to her that widow/ers could never remarry. Which, as far as I was able to find out isn't true. Remarriage isn't encouraged in any case but it's not forbidden.

But it puzzles me that her problem was that marriage might last after death. I mean I get that in heaven it's not going to be the same. There will be no marrying or giving in marriage, etc. I get that. But does that mean that we won't be reunited with our loved one after death? I'm not picturing some sort of sybaritic paradise where we're all laying about on couches feeding each other grapes and making with the monkey sex or anything. Like I've said elsewhere I've come to the conclusion that Heaven isn't so much a place as simply being in presence of God.

Meh. I guess it's just confusing to me why it would freak someone out to think that they were still tied to their spouse even after death. If you've been careful in your choices wouldn't you want to remain linked to the person that you love?

Anyway. It's interesting that I keep seeing mention of the fact that there are no wedding vows in the Orthodox service. And there are actually two wedding services. The betrothal and then the crowning. Interesting stuff.

I also like the fact that it's not common for the father to 'give away' the bride. I may have long running issues with that particular custom. Maybe. *shifty eyes*


  1. Oh, i didn't know that (last paragraphs) about Orthodox weddings -- great! :)

    it seems this lady didn't like the idea because she was not liking her marriage choice so much. At least not for ETERNITY!! :)

    Actually I'm sure quite a lot of people could relate to her dislike of such a thought seeing how the divorce rate is high.

    Enjoyed this!

  2. I am not sure what I would do if PB went before me. I would probably die myself. I am not sure I could go on....

  3. I've been married will be 19 years this spring...and it feels like my soul and my husbands soul are so intertwined, like plant roots permeating a sponge or somesuch, that we could not be separated. I think that what love and commitement and the sacrament of marriage do to two people. "And the two shall become one". I can only imagine what it will be like if God grants us both long lives and we see our 50th, 70th, etc. anniversary.

    I can't personally speak to what it's like to be re-married after widowhood...

  4. this is more to do with other blog posts, maybe the one about the stars... Which I cant help but keep thinking about.

    Quote For Today:
    There is a God shaped vacuum in the heart of every man which cannot be filled by any created thing, but only by God, the Creator, made known through Jesus. [Blaise Pascal]

    I found it on someone elses blog where it does a quote for each day. some form of blog apps...?

  5. it would seem that everyone is finding a little bit of cosmic bliss.

    I cant get it to do a proper link. So please alter if you know how.

    I am refering to the post on sunday the 2nd January 2011, titled, the most perculiar thing

    I hope you enjoy it

  6. Susanne,

    I hadn't known it either. I'm learning plenty of random things. :)

    I would think that this possibility of being tied to your spouse for eternity would be a good incentive, if you really needed one to be choosy!

  7. Slice,

    I think one of the hardest things we have to learn as humans is that the world doesn't stop for our sorrows. I've never lost a spouse, but I do know that when my grandfather died it was a shock that I still had to go on with my life. I assume that some similar feeling happens to everyone.

    Sometimes I think that we go on just because we don't know what else to do.

    I like the quote you gave us. :)

    Huh. That blog is odd. It doesn't let you click on the posts themselves. I wonder if there's something cosmic going around, giving people ecstatic feelings?

  8. Alana,

    And that's the impression I get of what marriage is meant to be like. That you become so close to your spouse that you are one in so many ways.

    I'm guessing that the horror at the idea of being tied to one person forever is something to do with the modern feeling about marriage. That it isn't permanent.

    I pray that God grants you and your husband many more years together.

  9. p.s. if I have to go on, on my own... I best learn how to work the boiler and heating, the playstation, the DVD, purchase a jar opener, learn how to iron properly. the list is endless. so no, he isnt allowed to go before me. and I have told him when I die he should marry a Thai bride.

    I dont want to think of him alone either.

    nope I dont even want to think about it any more. it makes me feel sad. back to the stars post and everyone feeling lovely.

  10. Slice,

    Go to the happy place! :)

    My grandfather Twelve, thirteen years ago. I hadn't realized it's been so long. Anyway. My grandmother had to learn to do a lot of things, like put gas in her car. When we had Hurricane Charley come through she didn't even bother to tape up the windows in her condo and then she stood there and watch the hurricane through her full length sliding glass doors. And later, when we all found out about this and pointed out how stupid and dangerous all of this was she said 'It was Joe's job and he died. He wasn't supposed to die first. So it's his fault.' *hands up*

  11. I take the rubbish out. so booo ya me!


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